How to Let Go When You Keep Replaying an Embarrassing Moment
Replaying embarrassing moments in your mind can feel overwhelming—like a recurring loop of shame and self-criticism. Maybe you said something wrong in a meeting at work, shared something personal with the wrong person, or opened up early in a relationship only to feel like you weren’t met with the same vulnerability in return. And then, there are those moments that just won’t leave your brain no matter how much time passes.
A big one for me that’s still on repeat from 2024? The time I unknowingly pulled my knickers out of my hoodie during a Zoom meeting and showed them to the other person on the call. OMG, I was mortified.
So, how do we stop these moments from haunting us? I asked our expert therapist, Birgitta Rönn, for advice on how to move on when embarrassment feels impossible to shake.
Birgitta’s Expert Tips on Letting Go
Birgitta says: Here’s something to consider—The moment you’re obsessing over? It’s likely far less significant to the other person than it feels to you.
When you catch yourself spiraling, try this:
Pause and take a deep breath. Don’t rush this. Give yourself a moment to reset instead of diving straight into the shame spiral.
Remind yourself of this: That moment was a tiny, minute percentage of all that I am. One moment does not define your entire existence.
Ask yourself: What would I say to a friend in my position? Chances are, you’d offer them kindness, perspective, and maybe even a laugh by reminding them of your own humiliating moments.
Look back at the things you’ve been through and survived. You’ve got more in the tank than you know. One cringey moment is nothing compared to the challenges you’ve faced and conquered.
Letting go doesn’t mean dismissing what happened—it means choosing to see it as just one small part of your story, not the whole picture. You’re human, and that’s more than enough.Wr
So, the next time your mind gets stuck in the past, remember all the things that have turned out okay, the praise you get for simply being you, and how bravely you’ve handled challenges before. And if all else fails, just think of me and my Zoom call knicker incident. If I can move on, you can too.
Written by Birgitta Ronn
Hypnotherapist and counsellor - Birgitta helps people to rewire unhelpful thought patterns and limiting beliefs, fostering positive self-relationships and outlooks.